When last we left off in this somewhat abandoned blog of ours (I never claimed to be timely), we had just received news of our being removed from the August program. That was several months ago, and I know that we haven’t provided many answers for our faithful followers. The reasoning for that is very simple- we have no answers yet.
The beginning of August has been difficult. We were supposed to be in Kenya right now. Probably just now getting the hang of the time difference and the culture and loving on those beautiful people. But we’re not in Kenya. We’re in Georgia. Hot, sticky, make you miserable, Georgia. And we’re still waiting for direction.
I’ve come to dread the inevitable question whenever we see a friend. “So when are y’all leaving? Oh that’s too bad. Well, what’s next?” because then we must verbally confirm the truth about us not leaving and also that we still don’t have a plan yet. It’s a progression of answers that are very well rehearsed. No longer are we tentatively trying to make eye contact with each other as we search for the right words. The words are just there, hanging between us, painfully. Coming to terms with this new stage of life has not been easy. Neither of us wanted to be living in this town as post-college graduates, working jobs that are not our passions, living day to day. It’s not where we saw ourselves months and months ago. Learning to be content has not been a graceful process, but we’re learning. A very wise friend reminded us recently that we will never get this season of our lives back, and I began to think on that. He’s right. I will never get these days back, and that’s sobering. And so, I’m trying to squeeze every ounce of joy from my days, that if I were to die tomorrow, I would die knowing I had lived and loved the tiny life I was given. Friends, that ain’t easy.
But Dallas makes it easier. And my puppies. And my family. And living on the lake. To combat the sadness that still lingers around my heart when I think of the adventures I am missing, Jesus has given me adventures of my own. They are far quieter than what I dreamed of, but they’re mine. My adventures are as simple as staying in a hostel for a night, trying bubble tea for the first time, crying throughout the entire Amy Winehouse documentary, spending hours in Whole Foods and falling asleep to Seinfeld every night. So these are the things I will focus on and these are the things I will thank Jesus for.
So I’ve ranted a little longer about being content than I intended to. I only meant to write this blog to give an update about our life, but rants are easy to give in to. But here we go. Dallas and I are planning on staying put (in our camper at the lake, thanks to some very dear friends) until the end of the year. This is to give us enough time to save and prepare for whatever it is that Jesus has in store for us. January is when we plan to either find a short term mission trip or find another mission opportunity to put your generous donations to use. Rest assured that those funds have been set aside for Jesus and have not been buying us cupcakes. Or ice cream. If this opportunity (which sounds so elusive) turns into something more permanent, then we have vowed to be flexible for however God chooses to use us. Afterwards, we have a timid plan of traveling around helping on farms/vineyards/whatever we can find (via WOOF or HelpX) for a little while to see the world and love on people along the way. To us, this is also a form of mission work, though much less conventional. Jesus ate with people. We want to do the same.
And there you have it. That’s as much of an update as I can give you. This is what we’re wrestling with, given to you with as much honesty as I can muster. We still (DESPERATELY) need your prayers, but are at a place of peace with where we are right now. It’s not what we wanted, but Jesus has been faithful through every second of it all, and we have very little choice but to trust Him right now. Be blessed, friends.